I have a birthmark on my left arm
That no one noticed till I was 7
A couple years ago I washed it away
Eyes were scarred that I would do charm
Now I’ll never forget that memory again!

My bad!
It’s my own fault!
(No... really!)
Not the fact that I’m my own plan,
And expect the best from myself!

Now all I have are my legs
And even they don’t stop when they’re trying to
I used to think they could stretch to their own finish
Now I know they’ve never been connected at all
Now I can’t remember how to repeat myself

My eyes were arguing
They tore open each other’s tissue
Don’t worry!
They’ll roll around...

I never really headbutted that lighter
The growth was not impeded
A symbol’s never one for cosmetics
I used to think that was high brow...

And I used to think my eyelids were swollen
And that my infections would die with time
And never have the same start in a separate area
Now they’ve finally combined

I want my hair to look like it does in my shadow
Or at least good with pencils in it
Maybe I should just stop running through
That’s why I like the subconscious most

I have a scar on my elbow
That reminds me of a burn paralleling a 9
Was it a halve or an incomplete rotation?
I couldn’t know..!

What does it mean to have an arm?
When “reach” is still confined to an action
I don’t think I’ve had the chance to cut my fingernails
And I will never make a scratch!

How much of our body is designed to fall away
And not improve itself.

This is the first time I haven’t wanted wings!

(Everything breathes)

(Part 2)

You’re fun when you’re not trying to be
You’re no fun when you’re trying to be yourself
You’re more fun when you’re not having it
You’re no fun when you’re trying at all

Yesterday I daydreamed i rejected your invite
A part of a band is just an idea of a goal
I thought you were what caused me to make music
I thought you were you

I’ve never been one to write about how I feel
So thanks for that I guess

I wouldn’t be surprised if this is love
I said “I wouldn’t be surprised if you weren’t loved”
You can’t kid yourself and say
“If you had more time, it would be better”

Did we collide or did you just repeat your path?

And what would you gain off of answering that?

I thought I was a contest for love
I fell in love with being me
I realized I am just a consolation (constellation)
And That I want to be

I want you to say that the first one hurts the most
So I can say “You’re the first one; I’ve cut out losing”

I need to stop falling in love with my friends
Or the idea of a stranger
Or really just falling at all...

(Part 3)

I can’t believe in me anymore
I do know that I could never move
I thought that I would just stay right here
At least that’s what was written

The ending never sees
What the start never finishes
And I will never notice that book again

I tried to adhere to a time
I thought consistency would educate
Something new!

I really really hoped…
I really really hoped for something!

I really really tried!
I really really tried to be me...

There is a body!
There will be a mind…
I will follow what remains me of a soul
And it will be mine

You are better without me!

I will keep barking my head off

I am just as I am

Looking back at these old ideas, realizing they once meant something to me

My name is max, but that’s not what they know me for…